Tar Heel Bred Tar Heel Dead

This week, Andy welcomes a special guest host to take us through the Boston College victory. Did we really just see Jackson Simmons start a game? J.P. Tokoto missed two dunks but not much else – we discuss his impact on the team. In Duke Sucks, we learn that Christian Laettner is auctioning off some of his most prized possessions.

Yeah, we know. We’ll stop pimping this book one day. But check this out! Here’s Andy’s nephew holding up the book on national TV after Clemson fans stormed the court.


In this week’s episode, Reed and Andy try not to get too down on the team after the 0-3 conference start. Leslie McDonald is back on the team, but could he be doing more to help? A recurring topic from last year rears its ugly head and we discuss what some would consider an unthinkable topic. In this week’s “Duke Sucks” segment, the book may have truly made a difference in a game – a special guest explains.

  • Well, at least we only have to play them once in the regular season.
  • Why do the announcers keep harping on our lack of 3-point shooting? What’s so hard to understand? Before McDonald came back, we had one player who could shoot it. One. Where’s the mystery?
  • Vitale’s solution was for UNC to “recruit shooters.” Um, guess what, Dickie V. Our roster this year should have included Hairston, McDonald, Paige, Bullock and Marshall.
  • Going into this one, you knew Johnson wouldn’t do much. His entire game is getting quick shots in the paint, something Syracuse really shuts down.
  • We love you, Meeks, but time to get tougher down low. Become a bull, dude.
  • McAdoo had a nice game (outside of foul shooting) and seemed to be the one player who wasn’t intimidated.
  • A game in which we score 45 points? In 2009, that’s one half of play.
  • Syracuse shows you that it’s pretty amazing how far you can go with a couple shooters and someone in the paint who can swat the ball on defense.
  • Even with James back, the rebounding still stunk.
  • 33% from the line. Wow.
  • What is going on with this team? That was more of a question than a statement. Sorry.
  • It really didn’t seem like that Joel James elbow was worth getting tossed for. Seemed inadvertent, but it’s really hard to tell on the replay. It’s weird that McDonald gets a Flagrant 1 for a clearly intentional elbow (albeit one that came after he was clearly jumped on with no foul called), while James gets ejected for this.
  • McDonald is really not good at finishing around the basket. He gets blocked or misses the shot almost every time. If he’s looking to expand his game beyond just the long ball, he’s going to have to get tougher around the rim.
  • You really gotta like Johnson’s fire. He’s the only one on the court that seems to show real emotion the whole game through. He’s pumped up. If only it were contagious.
  • We criticize McAdoo for his foul shooting, but his shot selection seems to be much better than it was last year. He doesn’t settle for jump shots as often as he used to. That said, good things don’t always happen when he drives, but at least he’s being aggressive.
  • Paige didn’t shoot very well. Again. He did have 8 assists though.
  • Tokoto clearly has a chance to become one of the greatest dunkers in Carolina history. Too bad his efforts are wasted in games like this.

You can read it here. The most shocking claim is that a couple of hoops players — they don’t name names — literally could not read or write when they got to UNC. Does anyone believe this? It’s possible they couldn’t read very well. It’s easy to see how star athletes could be sheltered from the workload that regular students have to complete. But to not be able to read at all after at least 12 years of school? Seems somewhat implausible in 2013.

That would mean that they couldn’t read a menu, couldn’t send an email, couldn’t go on Twitter, couldn’t read a playbook, couldn’t pass their driver’s test, couldn’t write a single essay in classes, and on and on and on and on. Would someone not notice? Can anyone think of one player in the last 5 years who meets all those criteria?

The article doesn’t specify when this student was supposedly enrolled, but it says it came “early” in the tutor’s career. Maybe that’s the 1970s. Who knows? Either way, seems a bit implausible.

It was another tough loss for the Heels with the game against Wake. So what exactly happened? Where will the Heels finish in the ACC? Also, we’ve got some New Year’s resolutions for the team. In Duke Sucks this week, K shows his true colors in a loss to his “friend.”


This week’s Duke Sucks

December 29, 2013

If you listened to the podcast, this is what we were talking about. Make you own jokes.



Kyle Singler

As the non-conference season draws to a close, we talk about the PJ Hairston situation a little more, try and figure out what the team’s real personality is, and give a little love to Isaiah Hicks. Also, we’ve got a weird stat we’ve created for Brice Johnson, and in the Duke Sucks segment, Kyle Singler has a new haircut and looks like he should be playing bass for New Order in 1983. Be afraid. Email us at thbthd@gmail.com


It’s an abbreviated “Andy Is Flying Solo” episode this week as Reed is traveling for the holidays. He tells you what he knows about PJ, discusses Leslie’s return to the court and tries to make sense of the Texas loss and Davidson near-loss. Has Hyde returned or is the team just adjusting to a reworked lineup? Of course you can’t have a podcast without a Duke Sucks segment. This week – Andy warns you about something stinking up the satellite radio waves.

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